I feel like such a chunk of meet. Up for observal and evaluations, as teachers try to work out if I can be used as their standard for how well they did.

Tomorrow I recieve my final report for the year. To my knowledge it's all b's. No I'm not proud of myself. In recent times I've spent my Physics lesson trying to fight back the tears of frustration, and Math has become almost theraputic in comparison. At least then I KNOW it's the numbers that are out to get me. Everything comes out wrong, and I can't see why. My art was bad because I got it done on time, before he told us how he wanted it done. My physics was bad, but I don't know exactly how because they were discussing my work amongst tehmselves (My physics teachers. Both of them.) and I never understand anything anymore. Am I just becoming slow?
My English was bad because, like I suspected, my 'progressions aren't logical'. I try to be so frekin logical, and I'm still irrational. The only thing that seems alright is my stupid damn information processing, And even that's left a stain on the printer that'll probably never come out. My math is bad and my frikkin teacher keeps on saying that there's nothing he can do. 'I think she'll do better'. Yeah, when? I have a problem, but no one can seem to see it. I can't ask for help because eiher I don't know what's wrong or I don't understand anything anyway. Where is everyone? Why am I distancing myself from everyone I'm supposed to be friends with? Why haven'y I stolen that bottle of french wine in the fridge? And more importantly, why the HELL does my outlook on existence look like Zen? I've never read Zen! I thought it was 'tree falling in the forrest' and all that sort of stuff.

I've never wanted to fly away more then right now. But I'd probably get air sick.

Praying to Eagles for the sun- and the sun for light
Washi.

"Body and Beats"
~Blisterin' the sun
- posted by Washi @ 8:42 pm