Washi books
Tuesday, September 30, 2003
Quick Word from the Jackrabbit
It's been a while since I visited the PL, but I did so last night. I needed to talk.And I got it out of my system, you all you puppies don't have to hear me bitch ^_^ I've been remembering things... It's dificult to explain, and you're likely not the person I should be explaining it too. I'm just confused. Maybe one day I'll find the words to tell someone other than PL.
Been sewing. Now want to make maskie. Hai.
Trunksu... so dirty :P
I got yelled at because I shut the back door last night. Me dog couldn't get out 'till I woke up 'round 12. I'll have to wake up earlier tomorrow to let her out.
's gotten darker. S'all.
Okay, that'll do for now. A proper update should come at a later time.
" Bus error -- driver executed. "
- posted by Washi @ 5:29 pm 0 comments
Tuesday, September 23, 2003
My Little Bloggie
I'm currently sitting in my rumpus room, at my own computer, with my own internet connection. Boy does it feel good. So I'm blogging (In time I should really spend doing other work... of which colouring this pic of Starr is NOT work but is getting done more than anything else in any case). Ah yes, i'm colouring a pic of Starr I did. The lines scanned absolutely atrociously and in some places aren't even there, so I've had to colour it the slow, long, painful way. But she looks pretty good so far, so with luck all will go well.
I went material shoping yesterday. Gots me all the stuff I shouould need for my next two projects - I'm looking forwards to the frog especially.
Onwards - what's been up with me lately? Whell, schoolastically speaking I'm starting to stress. Maybe it's having an effect on me, because I've been the emotional equivolent of an unbalanced scale. Put a little weight on one side, and the whole thing goes crashing that way. Which is distressiing because now is the time I really need to be stable. I think to much, it's as simple as that. I'm so self-centered.
I might go get another glass of Cherry Coke inna bit.
I really need to recouperate. My aches have now mostly gone, but I still feel all strung up and worn thin. Me and two-thirds of the western world huh? Guess I'll de-string myself over the christmas holidays, after my exams.
We might be hosting Zoe next week. I wonder what that will be like. We're very diferent people, and i'm a very irritating person to be around. Especially given I spend all day on the 'puter. Ah well.
Not much to say right now, since I don't want to whine for the entire post. so mcuh to do, and even with my whole days free to do them, nothing gets done.
"In the dark, I like to read his mind
but I'm frightened of the things I might find
Oh, there must be something he's thinking of
to tear him away"
~Aimee Mann - Voices Carry
- posted by Washi @ 3:04 pm 0 comments
Monday, September 15, 2003
Suplemental
Auditory : 37%
Visual : 62%
Left : 61%
Right : 38%
Erin, you are somewhat left-hemisphere dominant and show a preference for visual learning, although not extreme in either characteristic. You probably tend to do most things in moderation, but not always.
Your left-hemisphere dominance implies that your learning style is organized and structured, detail oriented and logical. Your visual preference, though, has you seeking stimulation and multiple data. Such an outlook can overwhelm structure and logic and create an almost continuous state of uncertainty and agitation. You may well suffer a feeling of continually trying to "catch up" with yourself.
Your tendency to be organized and logical and attend to details is reasonably well-established which should afford you success regardless of your chosen field of endeavor. You can "size up" situations and take in information rapidly. However, you must then subject that data to being classified and organized which causes you to "lose touch" with the immediacy of the problem.
Your logical and methodical nature hamper you in this regard though in the long run it may work to your advantage since you "learn from experience" and can go through the process more rapidly on subsequent occasions.
You remain predominantly functional in your orientation and practical. Abstraction and theory are secondary to application. In keeping with this, you focus on details until they manifest themselves in a unique pattern and only then work with the "larger whole."
With regards to your career choices, you have a mentality that would be good as a scientist, coach, athlete, design consultant, or an engineering technician. You can "see where you want to go" and even be able to "tell yourself," but find that you are "fighting yourself" at the darndest times.
www.mindmedia.com
Driretlan is your Vampire name.
You are a witty Vampire with a certain style that
others are drawn to.
To use your new Vampire name and become a Vampire,
go here:
www.life-blood.cjb.net
What is your Vampire name?
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You could truly be imortal given the chance. You
are rare breed of people who will never give up
and who will cherish life for as long as it is
gifted to them. Become immortal with my
blessings and good luck wishes: GO HERE
Do you have what it takes to live forever?
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My inner child is ten years old!
The adult world is pretty irrelevant to me. Whether
I'm off on my bicycle (or pony) exploring, lost
in a good book, or giggling with my best
friend, I live in a world apart, one full of
adventure and wonder and other stuff adults
don't understand.
How Old is Your Inner Child?
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You are The coward.
You are strange and you seldom fit in anywhere you
go because of your refusal to conform to the
"norm". This means you are a freak.
Although you might have quite alot of friends,
this is only because they got stuck with you at
an early age and are too nice to dump on you.
You think more than you act and you are a
general loner coward who hides behind your
mummy. You are also sensitive to other
people's needs, and are a sucker for guilt
trips. YOU ARE A PUSH OVER SNIVELLING BABY!
Learn to be stronger, coward: GO HERE
The EVIL TRUTH Personality Test
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You are the Quizilla Quiz:
"Title of Quiz"
Your maker was an idiot and he/she forgot to name
you. You could be about anything but nobody
will ever click on you so it doesn't matter.
If I were you, I'd GO HERE
What sort of Quizilla Quiz are you? (fun)
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Eat that Mnemorah. Although I gross alot more, get to be in a same-sex relationship and actually save the world if I use my real name. Ledi also becomes a tentacle monster, but she don't earn as much as I.
Nuff now.
- posted by Washi @ 3:18 pm 0 comments
Dead Ants
My computer arrived yesterday, sans one rather essential cord. Y'see, my old tower had the monitor plugged into the back of it for power, but my new one(Which I wasn't expecting to actually get, but I'm willing to assume thay they couldn't fit the new stuff in otherwise) lacks that plug. So I asked mum to pick up an extra cord and gave her some cash. So, goddess willing, I should be able to start patching the system up tonight.
Now, moving right along...
The movie night was okay. I got a popcorn maker - So cool!!! And some uber-nice PJ's, and ANOTHER dreamcatcher, and a photo pf Liam and I which is now on my bedside table and a black dressing-gown-thingie. Ledi tried to choke me. Said it was for nosing Ri-chan. I was probably asking for that. Bah. Fay was a little embarrasing, but Ri-chan didn't seem to mind. Ledi used it as a moping point. She uses most things as a moping point ^_^
Lauren didn't stay long. If I'd known she'd be coming late and Bee wouldn't be coming at all, I'd have invited some other people. Ah well. Ate a lot.
A whole heap of people have entered the room. Hate people. Especially hate people who talk THAT way. Bah.
Moving on...
Suddenly became rather... embarrased ain't the right word, and ashamed is way, WAY to strong... depressed? about my circle of friends. Probably shouldn't be. Dead normal set o' people and all that, reasonably friendly, nice fellows, all that. I think that I should be moving on right now...
I long for the day I get my quotes database back.
Lithium
What Nirvana song are you?
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You're Vincent! You are a nice guy who's just doin'
his job, and people can come to you for a good
conversation. You're a lot like Socrates,
really. Mostly it's just because you both die
in the end.
Which Pulp Fiction character are YOU?
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I am Jack's clenching bowels.
I am Jack's...? (pertaining to Fight Club)
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- posted by Washi @ 2:29 pm 0 comments
Tuesday, September 09, 2003
Can't Say For Sure I'll Get Access...
So, in case I can't get to the 'Net on the day to wish her a global, digital Happy birthday... Happy Birthday Iduna! Hope this birthday finds you, if not happy, then at least in good health... or, better health ^_^! I've still got that pic I drew for your 18th birtrhday - I've been planing to finally give it to you for a year, and I always forget when we hook up... Bah, bad puppy.
Anyway, wishing you the best.
Now, onto a little blah about MY birthday. This weekend is now the supposed date of my video-night (Hosted by Zoe on her mother's suggestion). About all I can say is, I hope Liam comes. Because I need someone there I actually want to talk to ^_^; I was gonna invite a couple of people I know, but the impression I'm getting from those concerned is that they'd really rather not. It bothers me a bit - Zoe was talking about how she wasn't going to be able to fit all the people in and maybe the new people would leave early so that we could watch DVD's. I only really wanted to invite two people other than Ri-chan. But apparently one of Lauren's friends is also coming so... I guess there's really no room for me to invite anyone else. Ledi, Zoe, Lozza, Bee (Codename for this post), Ri-chan, Myself... Poor Ri-chan's the only guy there. Sorry love -_-. I'd like to say I'd make it worth while to you, but they're very funny about PC, and Ledi will get jealous. She'll probably get jealous anyway, but...
I suppose its not really fair. After all, Zoe asked me if Bee could come, and I said yes... I had a feeling though she'd already mentioned it to Bee and, if I said no, it would seem... well, bad. Bee's like Loz - she gets exessive, probably gets just as bitchy too. They're trained that way. And I don't have the energy to deal with that crap. Especially not when they're convinced she should replace Ledi in the circle... Maybe I should just leave, let them all sort it out. They can play all they want to then, and I'll continue on my way.
Who'm I kidding. That goes against my nature. I'm just strugling to look forwards to the movie night with all my friends. Luckilly, movies imply silence.
I think I'll go comfort eat for a while. I have some white-chocolate twix - The world will seem that much better after that... And I'm going to Liam's tonight, so that's something to look forwards too.
"CHEESEBALL!!!"
~Necro, in a very odd idea o' mine...
- posted by Washi @ 1:55 pm 0 comments
Monday, September 08, 2003
Spring in the Air
I'm a bit behind in Java. It's due this week. I'll have to do a little extra work. I'll be heading off to do that in a bit, but I should get it finished.
I still lack a computer. Woe is me. I am woe. Jai.
Okay now, onto some more... serious shiznit. I had a sort of... half dream, half fantasy thing last night. It was odd, but it had that unusual quality of everything being so clear. I knew what to say, or more importantly I had the words to say. This weekend I'm afraid I was playing up a little - And this weekend especially I shouldn't have been. I'm so mean to poor Ri-chan ::sniffles::. So now, I confess. To a degree, as I've decided I don't want to blab very personal things that involve people other then me, to protect the other parties involved. So this will be a confession of an obscure nature. Maybe pack-mates who read this (Which, I believe, is the entire sum of Iduna and Ri-chan) can press for more details, but this is for the general populous, after all.
I got upset about something I probably shouldn't have, and felt... Odd I guess. In a bad way. I get upset over some reidiculous things. And I know it's my fault for being upset, because I know that what I'm upset about is unreasonable. And, really, I have no right to be upset. More importantly, if I'm going to get upset both ways in a situation, then what exactly am I expecting? If I wasn't me, I'd hit me so hard...
In my dream, I managed to get it all out... admittedly in my dream I spent around half the time choking, but hey - even I can put a little realism into my fantasy world. A part of me wants to tell, and a part of me knows it just isn't fair, for all the reasons above and more. I need to get my head on strait and start shaping up - get over these stupid little things. Mission statement. I gotta be better. Much, much better. I don't know how exactly, but I know I suck badly and must get better. Otherwise... I don't know, I don't want to think about it. I'll die.
Ohay, confessions over. You understand that? No? Coo, that's no problemo. Feelin positive - probably gone all fairy-flossed brained 'cause of the stuffy room, overwhealming stench of... people, I guess, just very smelly people, and cigarette smoke. I wish I'd bought some bubble-gum. I'd sell a non-essential organ for some bubblegum right now...
Mum got me the Hubba Bubba bag from the show. And a bag of sticks. But I forgot to bring anything from them to school - the first because I'm an idjit first class, the seccond because my teeth really, really hurt right now and eating anything that chewy would have me immobilised with pain. Or at least doubled over with watery eyes like a fat man half-way up a flight of stairs.
I've decided I'm going to try to elongate my life a little. While I have someone I'm happy to live it with, I plan to live it. However long that happens to be... That'll be seen.
Java piss me off something evil. Bag. Must work out this error. Stupid static. I try two ways, you no work either. It's cause of the Array I'll bet bust still...
Jus' cause I enjoy it, don't mean I'm any good at it. And vice versa.
Enough for now.
"I'm either gonna go as Jack... Or Jack."
~Kylan, loosely transcripted. I'm without my nice, extensive quotes database.
- posted by Washi @ 1:51 pm 0 comments
Friday, September 05, 2003
Ho! Roostalion!
A very quick blog, as I have to be in a CCCT tute in about... 25 minutes, and it takes me over an hour to formulate a good, coherent blog post on the best of days. Puppy not too bright these days, ne?
In any case, despite lacking the internet, I've had a chance to go to some journals I usually go to (But are not linked from here, as I cannot see these people wanting to be associated with me or my blog in any way, as well as some that are.) And first off, allow me to say I want to give Dani a big hug right about know. I know it sucks - and I doubt it would help her any if I told her it was just the pains of the teenage years. The song may say 'the pains of seventeens aaren't real, they're only dreams' but they seem pretty damned real when you're living them, thankyou very much. I really hope things work out for her. She's a good kid, bright, and more importntly then any of that crap, alive.
Now, onto the body of the post. I never really understood what it was in the human condition that made people so strongly desire to 'be with someone'. I suspected, and still do suspect, that it has something to do with an inate sence of survival that causes us all, especially us females, to seak out a permament mate and the percieved security and solidarity that will give us. But it seems to make people incapable of being content to be without. I know, at the begining of this year, I was very content to be without a boyfriend - Indeed, I didn't really think I would get one, as I've not been actively sarching and, in many cases, went out of my way to avoid situations where I might be aproached as a potential trophey to some young buck wanting to try his luck with that piece of flesh. Dating, to me, has always seemed more of a systematic run of grading yourself down for some man or other in the hopes that, eventually, you'll hit one that is capable of caring about you the way you wish to be cared about, or that you are capable of caring about enough to make you put up with all the crap that automatically comes with any sort of relationship.
Yes, I was cynical at best. But I also understood the nature of the Teenage male society, and what a young man searching for his place in the society may have to go through or figure out. I was also very aware that some guys just didn't care and saw girls as some sort of toy to go after. And, of course, some girls saw themselves as a toy to go after. I don't think they could be saved.
So, the point I'm trying to get at here? Even as against dating as I was, I still sometimes found myself playing the trialing game - You know, you talk to each other once or twice, you play the games with questions (Almost virtual sex, especially among virgins), meeting in a neutral third place - But I always remained, if not cold with my responses, then not the blatant, blazing bonfire beacon that most young men, wraped up in their own worries about the whole situation, are able to detect. As a result, I remained hapilly single and endured the occasional embarrasing comment thrown my way.
The main point here is, I was not looking, had convinced myself (And was possibly accurate) that I didn't need one and, after getting over the disapointment I felt at discovering I was not a lesbian (Thankfully, my friends understood and could accept me for who I was), I was asked out. Women always say that - when someone says 'No, I'm quite happy with my life right now actually - I'm not really looking for a guy' they'll squeal as one with delight and say 'That's the time it usually happens!' as though it were the ideal. I do not believe it is - but I am very, very grateful to have been found, as that's the only way to put it - I certainly wasn't looking for anyone.
And I come to a point where I can see the drive some girls have to find that other person - Someone who makes them feel loved, attractive, important, wanted... But it saddens me that not even I could find that in myself alone. That I need someone else to help me feel that way, or my own sense of doubt will eat away at me. The constant need for a partner is a constant need for validation - the assurance of that. But people don't always get it, and they become confused, hurd, dejected... messed up as a box of yarn with a dozen kittens in it. I am grateful for what I have, and I want to keep it alive and healthy by giving back as good as I get. I just hope there are enough decent guys out there for all the decent girls out there - Sometimes, it doesn't feel like it.
But that just serves to make me all the more grateful.
No quote - Gotta rush off to class now. Enjoy, ne?
- posted by Washi @ 2:10 pm 0 comments
Thursday, September 04, 2003
Just quickly...
Still no 'puter. My whole area smelt like horse manuer this morning. I have no idea why. I've lost my bus tickets. I'm upset about that. They were barely used. puppy whimper.
Notice how B is nowhere near P?
Laters.
- posted by Washi @ 1:56 pm 0 comments
Monday, September 01, 2003
