I think I want to clarify. I am by nature very interested in religion. All religion, not whichever one you appen to think of right then. I'm not christian, and it's not just because my family isn't or because I want to be diferent. I studdied religion and the bible at school - in a catholic school I was always the best at religious studies, and greatly respected my very religious teachers. But I couldn't follow that faith. Don't get me wrong, I like Jesus a lot. I think he's cool. It's God himself I've got the problem with. But this is entirely beside the point. One of the religions I took an interest in once was the notion of the Totemic belief. It's very strong in aboriginal culture, and it's something you're born to - Your family has a totem, which you respect as an ancestor. but looking at my family's crest, Our heraldric animal was a Lion. "Royal is my blood" and all that. I went up to Port Clinton with a friend and thought it over, and after much deliberation decided I would try to dream of my 'totem animal', as I percieved it at the time. And, I'll be honnest with you, I was secretly begging for a wolf, as I was totally wolf mad. Still am. But I didn't dream the wolf, and the more I tried to think of a wolf running through the forest, the more I could hear the sound of an eagle cackling at me. I thought perhaps the idea had been planted in my head on the drive back - a large bird of prey was chasing a smaller bird, which lost it by diving under the car. No one knew what it was. But then I had the dream.

It started as all my important dreams did - My brother was driving a car. My fathers ex girlfriends old car, to be exact. Such oddity is standard. In any case, I was dropped off at a beach. I can still remember it vividly - The sand was white, and the place was piled high with seaweed. If I could have smelt it, it would probably have smelt foul. The ocean was a long way below me, and I was on some sort of sand cliff from which I could look down and see it. Everything was in shades of blue-grey and black, even me.
Suddenly, and quite out of nowhere, a massive wave came up onto my high point, knocking me off my feet and nearly washing me out to sea. The ocean retreated back to where it was, and I was left on my high point. Dazed, I started to walk.
Out of nowhere I heard an avian scream. Snapped back to un-reality I looked to my side, where a dead tree clung. Perched in one of it's branches was a pale masive raptor- An eagle. I remember the way it moved far more vividly then the way it looked - It looked grey and blue, like everything else in the dream. Here I realised I had waded into a pool of thick, black and stagnent water that would probably have smelt worse then the beach had I been able to smell. Another step, and I would have drowned. I awoke, knowing that if the bird hadn't woken me I would have stupidly submerged myself in that disgusting briny pool. From then on I adopted the Eagle as an important part of me, and have since become somewhat totemic in regards to him. He is reponsable for my net name: Washi. I have yet to dream of him again, but then I haven't had anything you could really call signifigant happen in my dreams for a while. Escaping from Bluebeard probably only proves I read too many fairytales.

In any case, despite my still strong love of wolves and deep respect for horses, eagles, especially sea eagles, hold my loyalty. Still, I daren't draw them for fear of destroying them.

I know a little of the way Eagles are prercieved around the place, from the symbol of america that is the bald eagle, to the Eagle as the animal totem for spirit, to old man Wildu. I remember Jan telling me that the eagle sees all - He's suposed to be the only living thing capable of looking into the eyes of the sun. And in the story of the magpie and crow he punishes his nephiews by trapping them in a cave with a heap of other birds and lighting a fire to burn them. The moral of THAT story is don't piss of the eagle, got it? He's featured in heraldry because he's a damn scary looking bird, and Seeing wedgies is one of the most wonderfull things you can do. By the by, Wedgies are Wedge-tailed eagles. I've never seen a white bellied sea eagle, since they live on the coasts of every state except this one, but I've seen wedgies at wilpena pound.

In any case, you've all been let in on the secret of my soul. 'What I want, an eagle feather...'

"Wind was blowing, time stood still
Eagle flew out of the night
He was something to observe
Came in close I heard a voice
Straining, streatching every nerve
Had to listen, had no choice."

~Solsburry hill, Peter Gabrielle
- posted by Washi @ 10:59 pm